Seven Antagonistic Forces That Kill A Relationship Faster.
It’s apparent we know what kills a relationship but I bet, you don’t know what kills it more faster than what you think you know.
We know unfaithfulness, infidelity, cheating lack of trust, money, sex, etc kill but have you taken your time to wonder if they are really the major problem. You know, bullet and sword kill but the tongue kills faster so, be careful for nothing.
Let’s take a look at what we don’t think can kill our relationships even before we know it.
1. Modern Lie.
You would be wondering what a Morden lie could be or mean. Modern Lie is anything that’s under package, anything that’s not in its original form. Take a look at makeup, wigs and any artificial thing we use to beautify ourselves. They are all modern lies because a man that sees you with those makeup and like you, what do you think he will do when he discovers your beauty isn’t up to the standard of the makeup you carry? That’s why guys, after chasing and getting you, they tend to hit and run away because you aren’t the original copy of yourself or you aren’t what they think or felt you are. There are other factors that add to this but we haven’t been mindful of this one.
Always look through, if at all you must apply makeup, let it be moderate. Take a proper bath make sure the reason you apply perfume or any fragrance isn’t because you have body odor. Don’t over package yourself, don’t let your cover page speak volume and you the content, be met on low quality.
2. Pet Names.
Sometime, we don’t seem to think this goes a long way to strengthen our relationship. You don’t think there is a need for you to pet and pamper your partner hence they are yours but you forget you are opening them to risk.
The guy that’s chasing you, another girl is chasing him, and the chain continues like that.
With pet names, you can protect and safeguard your partner. Call him pet names; dear, sweetheart, my love, darling and lots more. On hearing that, they feel loved even if the love is scam. They are happy, when you praise them in love, it gives them sense of belonging. Don’t forget you aren’t the only beautiful lady or handsome guy on earth. If you fail to call them pet names, other people are out there calling him or her such names, making them feel loved and drifting their heart away from you, so be wise to make your partner feel special because it’s one of the ways to secure them.
Please don’t promise at all if you can’t fulfil it. It’s better to say you don’t know than promising, just to make them happy but you didn’t live up to that promise. All these little things matter but we don’t just acknowledge them. When you promise, you raise one’s hope high and they expect you to live up to that promise. When you don’t, you kill their morale and expectations. So, if what you promised them demands urgent attention, they will try their possible best to meet the demand which might not suit your own constitution.
Let me remind you this, your guy didn’t toast or approach you because you are just beautiful alone. Ask him, he will tell you your smile, your dimple, your joviality and the likes.
Again, no guy ever want a serious relationship, what guys want is a playful and romantic relationship whereby they see you as their friend, their mother and their lover. How can you make your relationship romantic if you aren’t spontaneous and jovial? Putting on a stern or ascetic face will only scare him away or make them think otherwise.
From a playful and romantic relationship, we see and define a serious and committed relationship.
Always remind him how special he is to you, pamper him just like the way you would want him to pamper you, vice versa.
When I say romantic relationship, I didn’t mean sex. Infact, sex isn’t romantic. Try creating memories outside sex and you will see a true defination of a romantic relationship. The same goes to the guys too.
4. I Am Sorry.
No matter how religious, careful or caring you can ever be, you must offend your partner or they must offend you so, you must learn how to say you are sorry almost all the time because a soft word melts the heart.
Remember, there are different types of sorry and different ways of saying them. Make sure your partner feels the emotion when you apologise. This is why you don’t have to be serious all the time because not all offences deserve a serious apology. There are some offences you can just apologise with a kiss, a wink, a cuddle or even a trait. Don’t say you aren’t the one at fault and so, you won’t apologise. If you love and want your relationship to live long, learn to say sorry when there is a little disagreement.
Study The Atmosphere.
This is one of the reasons we hate our partners. This is because we don’t understand them, let alone understanding what they could be passing through. There would be a time your partner would tell you they want to be alone, or even transfer aggression to you. Don’t take that to heart, calm down so they can calm down, then you address the issue.
Don’t always interfere or interrupt their privacy when they want to be alone. Understand their mood and be of help in any little way we can. We don’t seem to forget who helped us in times of our needs.
5. Who Are you?
This is one of the reasons we find ourselves in a relationship we didn’t fit in. Before you go into any relationship, define yourself, your worth, what you are made of and what you want in the relationship then work towards it. Relationship to me, is a pre-marriage where you learn to live with your partner and turn them to spouse.
If you are the calm type and can’t handle or live with a lousy type, why accept such a person into your life? Know what you want and those that possess at least, half of them because you can’t have all you ever want in a single man but you can work and build them in your partner. You are not in a relationship to tolerate or maintain, you are there to explore and work towards the future. Any relationship that doesn’t have something to say or do about the future has to be checked because most of us this days only date for money and sex.
Know who you are and who can compliment you. With that, you won’t have much problem because you have dealt with the major one.
Everybody wants something good and clean. If you aren’t clean or taking good care of yourself, you will be a past tense soon or even a tokumbo, second hand material because guys don’t want someone who stinks or can’t maintain or take care of herself, same thing goes to guys.
Always take care of your house, your room because all these things define you. If you are a clean type, you won’t allow things around you to be dirty or tattered.
Pride goes before a fall they say and you know, it’s better to be happy than being dignified, fighting to maintain or safeguard your pride.
Don’t make your partner feel vulnerable or unwanted because you are always the one doing this and that. Don’t boast out there because anything you do somehow will speak of you. Always know when to talk and react. Let your absence announce your presence, not the other way round.
All these matter but we don’t seem to count them. Always learn to be like the person you desire to date and also try to do unto others, the way you want them to do unto you.
All these things count as much as cheating, infidelity, unfaithfulness, and other things we know. Don’t think they are little because just a little drops of water can make a mighty ocean and as small as the tongue, it’s the most dangerous weapon in the body. Don’t take chances if you want to safeguard your relationship.
Till I cross your path again-
I hang my pen 🖋
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